I'm going back to Oklahoma today to visit my family. I have lived in California now for four years and I still refer to Oklahoma as home. I suppose it will always be so.

"Home Sick"

I saw my father today.

Looked him in the face and stared deep into his eyes.

I turned to him my back

upon saying our goodbye's.

My mother, she left early,

for her tears she could not hide.

We need strength in times of darkness

and weakness is to cry.

Attempting to re-define

this abstract word that we call home.

There's one for me a thousand miles away

but can I create my own?

Foreign to this land.

Detached from the one's I know.

Questioning my decisions,

Decisions to stay or to go.

All I have is hope

and even that is running thin.

With a nervous hand and twitching eye

depression crawls through my skin.

Unsure of where I'm at

or where I ought to be.

Knowing only that I'm alone,

separate from family.

Sick from separation,

my stomach turns and growls.

I hunger for connection.

My stubborn mind is proud.

So I remain in dark allies

with one eye always looking back.

Longing for the day

When I am re-attached.

© 2007 Matt Bohannon

Poetry

I decided that since I cannot keep up a blog of my life (given that it is not that interesting) that I will change the purpose of said blog. It shall be now a publication of poetry. My poetry and perhaps other works by inspiring writers. The first piece I present to you is one of my personal favorites. It is entitled "I Thought About You Then"

"I Thought About You Then"

I thought about You last night

but I didn't speak a word

I've talked to You before and wondered

if you ever heard

We used to be good friends

but I don't remember when...

I thought about You then

Alone in this room

i lie with wide eyes

Numb to the touch

lungs filled with sighs

Our distance seems so grand

in reality is so thin...

I thought about You then

Standing before the sink

conscience not so clear

Don't dare look in that mirror!

the thought brings forth a tear

Pick up the dirt and blood stained soap

i wash my hands again...

I thought about You then

It's chilly out

on this starless sky

While a cold, silent whisper

simply passes by

Fear strikes my tongue

conscience of my sin...

I thought about You then

Miles lay before me

and blisters rule my feet

I realize that I have become

the lost and wondering sheep

Reluctant soul. Fast paced heart

i know that I can't win...

I thought about You then

Tired now of running

hiding, obsolete

Ashamed to confess

his need in my defeat

Words trapped within

to speak, I don't know how

I thought about You then

I can't be without You now.

© 2007 Matt Bohannon