"Dying Man"

“Dying Man”

He sat in bewilderment

as if suddenly unable to stand.

Saying nothing yet having

The contemplative look of a dying man.

One who begins to realize

the evanescence of his frame.

“Remember me” he longs to say

possessing no such claim.

Like the ebbing of a tide

that created such great waves

he was the master of his sea

and now has become its slave.

It takes all his strength to tolerate

and maintain composure in his mess.

Holding is anxiety

deep within his chest.

Placid face. Quiet eyes.

His reality goes unseen.

Beneath the stillness of his skin

he’s anything but serene.

Sitting alone quietly

the stillness he can’t stand.

Saying nothing, staring out with

the contemplative look of a dying man.  

© 2009 Matt Bohannon

Wandering

This is a long one so i'll keep the intro short. Here it is,

"Wandering"

The forest stretches wide as it sprints deep.

The ground has grown dark from the canopy of its trees.

Stepping into its jurisdiction, wondering to its ends

Wrestling with it's captivation, forging through its limbs.

It's depth is what I'm after, it's depth I will reach

But beyond my forests depth I'll be confronted with a peak.

Alone? I'm not. Place my hands on this rock.

I will not quit, I will not quit until I reach its top.

Stand up straight, take a breath, the air is thin and cold.

Take a look. The view exquisite as well as challenging and bold.

Shrug the bitterness off  my shoulders. My hands brush off the frost.

Hearing voices in the distance, echoing "Your Lost."

Descend from my forte, the valley awaits.

Sorrow's thick, darkness reigns, still Peace in me creates

Joy emerged unyielding, Love again prevails.

Telling of such tales that sure Faith never fails.

Still the voices, louder, "Put down your cross"

I know the truth that while I wander, that doesn't mean I'm lost.

But the valley's cold with continued depth, dark clouds fill the sky

The rain comes down, the waters rise, I question, where am I?

The sun breaks through, the flood recedes, I climb from out my low.

My journey's long and testing, where next it leads me I don't know.

The sun's light is blinding, to shield my eyes I raise my hand.

I see my journey junctions through this desolate land.

Stare off at the horizon, intensely it stares back.

It questions my crossing of it's desert, implying the distance inside I lack.

My legs burn with cramps, my feet are weak and slow.

The deserts edge looks just as far as it did a mile ago.

What's the distance? Do I have it? I have to go some more.

Still I pine for its edge, to its distance I implore.

With every step I am reminded of the path I never found.

The desert only grants me with dry cracks on it's ground.

The voices speak of how I'm lost, searching for where I belong.

I tell the truth, I have been found, I've been found all along.

© Matt Bohannon 2009

Migrants of Hope

Traveled from afar, migrants of hope

Crawling in the silence, scraping their souls, stitching our cloths

Dwelling in still shadows cast by skyscrapers of greed

Premeditated blindness–on the invisibles rights they impede
The innerworkings of a clock, they comprise our great machine

Lying behind the face–their presence goes unseen

They work for while their good then get thrown away

A piece of trash left on the street and all without a say

Cries for help are not heard poverty keeps them hoarse

No one dares inquire about our savings source.

Take advantage of low cost there’s a sale today

Lose no sleep while you forget that someone has to pay

© 2009 Matt Bohannon

Voice Gone. Can't Shout.

Voice Gone. Can't Shout.

Trouble. I need escape.

Searching. My hope deflates.

Danger. I can't get out.

Voice gone. Can't shout.

Shallow. My breath is trapped.

Mocked. The anger laughs.

Shadows. The demons dance.

Rescue. Not a chance.

Desolate. Deserted land

Reaching. Empty hand.

Break. My soul my bone.

Solitude. All alone.

Dry. My heart my eyes.

Life. Slowly die.

Ache. From inside out.

Voice gone. Can't shout.

© 2009 Matt Bohannon

Delusions

The inspiration that I got for this poem came from Psalm 4. Check it out.

"Delusions"

Silent in my bed I searched my heart

and did not find what you'd expect.

Gold was not what was discovered,

but delusions that the evil counsels did elect.

These delusions, my delusions

I've sought for many days.

How long must I love false gods

and turn Your glory into shame?

Hear me, answer me.

Give relief to my distress.

Free me from my cell.

I've been a captive of evil arrest.

Your face brings great joy.

You alone I find peace.

Finally I lay down,

in safety I fall asleep.

© 2009 Matt Bohannon

Good

“Good”

The consequence of good is often death.

The consequence of righteousness leaves no room for rest.

Can good be true without the absence of bad?

Will we ever find the peace that this world once had?

With people being used as a means to an end

We must be careful about who we call friends.

How can we promote good while we’re constantly in defense?

Confused by what is good, definitions don’t make sense.

This is the home we have created.

Morals sedated, ego inflated.

Welcome to our home free from peace and clarity.

Welcome to your home, a masterpiece of tragedy.

©2009 Matt Bohannon

I'm going back to Oklahoma today to visit my family. I have lived in California now for four years and I still refer to Oklahoma as home. I suppose it will always be so.

"Home Sick"

I saw my father today.

Looked him in the face and stared deep into his eyes.

I turned to him my back

upon saying our goodbye's.

My mother, she left early,

for her tears she could not hide.

We need strength in times of darkness

and weakness is to cry.

Attempting to re-define

this abstract word that we call home.

There's one for me a thousand miles away

but can I create my own?

Foreign to this land.

Detached from the one's I know.

Questioning my decisions,

Decisions to stay or to go.

All I have is hope

and even that is running thin.

With a nervous hand and twitching eye

depression crawls through my skin.

Unsure of where I'm at

or where I ought to be.

Knowing only that I'm alone,

separate from family.

Sick from separation,

my stomach turns and growls.

I hunger for connection.

My stubborn mind is proud.

So I remain in dark allies

with one eye always looking back.

Longing for the day

When I am re-attached.

© 2007 Matt Bohannon

Poetry

I decided that since I cannot keep up a blog of my life (given that it is not that interesting) that I will change the purpose of said blog. It shall be now a publication of poetry. My poetry and perhaps other works by inspiring writers. The first piece I present to you is one of my personal favorites. It is entitled "I Thought About You Then"

"I Thought About You Then"

I thought about You last night

but I didn't speak a word

I've talked to You before and wondered

if you ever heard

We used to be good friends

but I don't remember when...

I thought about You then

Alone in this room

i lie with wide eyes

Numb to the touch

lungs filled with sighs

Our distance seems so grand

in reality is so thin...

I thought about You then

Standing before the sink

conscience not so clear

Don't dare look in that mirror!

the thought brings forth a tear

Pick up the dirt and blood stained soap

i wash my hands again...

I thought about You then

It's chilly out

on this starless sky

While a cold, silent whisper

simply passes by

Fear strikes my tongue

conscience of my sin...

I thought about You then

Miles lay before me

and blisters rule my feet

I realize that I have become

the lost and wondering sheep

Reluctant soul. Fast paced heart

i know that I can't win...

I thought about You then

Tired now of running

hiding, obsolete

Ashamed to confess

his need in my defeat

Words trapped within

to speak, I don't know how

I thought about You then

I can't be without You now.

© 2007 Matt Bohannon

Re-Learning to Wait

Patience. A virtue that has grown virtually extinct in todays society. Being hunted down by technology that is motivated by human greed.

My scooter has been out of commission now for just over a week. Between school and work my days are busy and my transportation needs are high. With my scooter in the shop, I had to find alternative transportation. I have been forced to take the bus to school. Something I haven't done since I was a sophomore in high school. Now each day I wake up early to walk out to the bus stop and wait. 

Do you remember what it is like to wait? Most of us have tried to eliminate waiting in our lives. If you are in control then you don't have to wait. Waiting = powerlessness. 

This past week I have had to wait...a lot. Or at least a lot more than what I am used to. There is a certain feeling one can get while waiting. A feeling of nervousness, anticipation, anxiety. These are the feelings I normally get when I have to wait. When I am powerless and not in control. 

These are feelings I hate.

It is easy to get caught up in life. After all, it demands everything you've got. As difficult and stressful as this last week has been, I have began to re-learn something that I should have never forgot how to do. Wait. We are brought up in a culture that has forgotten how to wait. At least, I know I have. 

Towards the end of the week something phenomenal happened to me. A revelation if you will. As I waited, my nervousness, anticipation and anxiety disappeared and something beautiful appeared in its place. What stood with me instead was Peace. 

The Bible is filled with teachings about waiting. Psalms 27:14 states " Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord." Using strength and waiting in the same instance contradicts todays theology. God wants us to wait, for when we wait we discover some really beautiful things. We find strength and now I realize, we find peace.